Recaps 2 - First brush with Parliament

For those just joining the Ministry, when we asked solicitors the question, "How do we prosecute an MP for lying" the answer was a resounding "You can't" - try "the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards".

We did.

It was our first brush with Parliament...

Inspector Mawers (that's enough.Ed) - the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards

If you read up on this whole self-regulation business it looks a bit like smoke and mirrors. Plenty of bodies, committees and commissioners - all independent to a man but all reporting to Parliament or the PM. Nice to be Judge and Jury at your own trial, eh ?

Needless to say, when Sir Philip Mawer returned our call, it was a bit of a shocker. We never thought in a million years they'd let us near the Palace of Westminster - let alone interview its gatekeeper of ethics and morals.

Turns out Sir Philip's office is round the back of Westminster Abbey. Bathed in divine light, you enter through a hobbit-like gate set into a suitably intimidating wall with Westminster casting suitably ominous shadows.

Passing through that gate would be crossing the line from pissing about on the Internet to sticking our head above the establishment parapet. Were we really gonna tough it out with the guy who politics between Teflon Tony and hauling MPs over the coals ?

Who are we kidding ?

I'd had a curry before-hand and that didn't bode well.

We were in a lot of trouble.